Frequently asked questions
Who should I buy an insult cup for?
First off, don't be a bully.
If some decent person would be upset by one of our pieces, don't give them one!
If you're sending one as a gift, sign the damn card. No one likes a mystery insult teacup.
I have a dark sense of humor, not everyone does and that's ok.
KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE.
Is your china safe to use?
We use food safe inks on all of our pieces. Our new pieces are sturdy and approved for food safety. We want you to use them!
We recommend only using our vintage pieces for display. While our inks are food safe, the pieces themselves are antiques.
Read the description of the pieces and consider whether you want to display it or use it every day.
When will I receive my order?
We ship the majority of orders within a week of purchase. If you order one of our pre-order pieces, those have longer ship times.
We'd like to speed that up and deliver you cups faster, but currently each cup is insulted by hand and that takes time.
Once your order has shipped you will receive a tracking number via email.
If you require rush shipping, please email us to discuss options.
Do you have a physical store?
No, dearie, we are strictly an online venture. We're like an evil unicorn.
We do make appearances at various fleas and pop-ups.
Do you ship internationally?
You are all witty people and we like that.
Our website accepts international orders and calculates shipping costs for you.
Do you accept custom orders?
Very rarely and never during the holiday season. You can always email us and we will respond within a week if we are able to create the piece.
What is your return policy?
Because each of our cups and plates is made to order, we do not accept returns unless your order arrived damaged or incorrect
What happens if my order arrives and it's damaged?
While it's highly unlikely your order will break in shipping, it can happen.
We are dealing in the delicate art of china after all.
Should your precious cargo arrive in pieces, please retain the box and email us a photo of your broken treasure.
Are your cups and plates guaranteed?
Should you ever experience a problem with the images that we have added to the china, we will repair them for free. Just be aware that we are not responsible for the irregularities that occur from vintage piece to vintage piece. Time takes a toll on all of us and these are altered works of vintage art. Let's see your patina in 200 years.
Do you offer wholesale or consignment?
That's a complicated question. Please email us.
Do you really drink that much tea?
Every bloody day.
What's being married to a puppeteer like?
Weird and awesome.
Do you really have a cat army?
Yes. They will cut you.
Do you hate everyone?
Yes, mostly. Not you though, dear. xoxo
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